Sunday, October 3, 2010

Time To Unplug










I'm noticing another cycle of communication break-down, and it's as annoying as the last one, less than a month ago. I don't know why it happens or what purpose it serves, but it sucks to be misunderstood when you're doing everything in your power to be clear, or even just trying to keep something interesting going. Sometimes this seems like a barrier no one can get around. By this point in my life, I should know when to open my mouth and when not to, but I'm still stumbling.

As great as the internet is, it often seems like a kind of satanic virus that's captured all of our souls. I came from a world that didn't have it, and functioned just fine without it. It's time I take a break from cyber-hell, and get into an old-fashioned book. Sitting here isn't helping me learn Greek, become a better composer, or get anything else done around the house that requires attention. The idiot box that was once my TV is now this screen in front of me, a giant black hole endlessly sucking energy into an infinite multi-verse going nowhere. Now is the perfect time for a road trip within.

October 1st marked the 10th anniversary of the death of my friend and co-worker Terii Foster. She was a sensitive and compassionate person, always kind to animals and people, especially the downtrodden and mistreated. Of the many things I could say, I will say the most important one -- she was a person with a good heart, the type this world needs more of, not less, and I miss her. I want her to know that she's remembered. I hope someday I can see her again and we can laugh together in the sun. She liked Hefeweizen with extra lemons, and this song, which I remember her playing on the jukebox at work. Late at night when I'm alone washing dishes or counting the safe, I feel myself standing in the place she used to be...



Am I long way from your heart
I wonder
Is this where love is, heartache starts
I wonder

I wonder if you ever think about me
And how good our old loving used to be
Sometimes
Sometimes I wonder

When you left with one last curious look
I wonder
I tried to call you, you changed the number on me
I really wonder

You tell me things to get me where you want me to be
How come I feel your getting the best of me
sometimes
I wonder

I hear a car coming round the corner
I hear footsteps on my front porch
I see a shadow from the light above
I hear a voice,
Oh it's not yours

Why does this happen
What's going on
I wonder
Could this be a dream, or has Bob gone crazy
I wonder

How come I feel your taking advantage of me
Why can't I get you out of me
Sometimes
Sometimes I wonder

They say that time will heal my broken heart
I wonder
Could it be that I'm blind,
All alone in the dark
I wonder

I can't help feeling this way
If I could leave, I'd surely leave today
Sometimes I wonder

It seems to me you still wanna be around
But when I see you, all hell starts breaking down
Sometimes I wonder

I really wonder